I get it. You are a busy working woman who is likely in a relationship and has kids. I mean, that alone is enough to burn a woman out.
It’s plain to see that women have a lot on their plates. Heavens, even the researchers are figuring out that women are more likely to suffer burnout than men.
You get up after too little sleep, waking up feeling less than refreshed. Why wouldn’t your mind just relax wo you could get some rest already?!
Then you either skip breakfast or grab a cup of coffee and a tub of low fat yogurt and think this will get you by until noon. If you are a mom then you also have the pleasure of getting the kids up, fed and at least brushing their hair and teeth before you have to run off to work (either at home now with Covid or heading into the office).
You used to love your job, maybe you still do, but it wears you out way more than it ever used to. You’ve lost some of your passion but remember the good ol’ days which keeps you moving forward hoping you’ll feel that way again.
You do the work, people love you and think you’re the best and they couldn’t live without you. You love being a part of the team. It makes you feel important (unlike your kids who you feel like a maid and cook to most days). So you give it your all.
You give so much to your family and your work that you forget to take care of yourself. Come on, you tell everyone on your team to take good care of themselves and get to yoga. But when was the last time you went?
Here we are at the end of the day…exhausted. But you can’t sit down to rest. You’ve got to make dinner. Find out how everyone’s day went. Make sure homework is done. Get the kids to bed. If you are lucky your man will cuddle in next to you to show you some appreciation and then you feel irritated because he wants some and you just don’t have it in you to even have a quicky.
How did this happen? Ugh!
Your life has turned into a hamster wheel and it is sucking the life right out of you!!!!
Enough! Burning yourself out, doing everything for everyone and listing more to the “I shoulds…” I should get the laundry folded….I should send out that last email even though it will take me an hour….I should have sex to let him know I still love him…”
What happened to the carefree, fun loving woman you used to be who listened to her heart?
Today is the day you begin to reclaim your life, your health and your vitality.
Here are three super simple steps you can take to get out of your hamster wheel and back in touch with the real you. And, they aren’t an extra thing you have to add to your to do list. In fact, lets start there with your to do list.
1. Stop Multi-Tasking
If you are like most women, you multi-task like a boss and add that to your high achiever list of accomplishments. The problem with multitasking is that you are burning the candle at both ends, constantly on the go, rarely finishing things fully and then having those loose ends wake you up in the middle of the night, beating yourself up for forgetting to do that last little detail.
By doing one thing at a time, you will let your mind relax and focus on the task at hand. It will actually take you less time to do just one thing and then the next because you’ll be less distracted.
It’s fine to cook broccoli and chicken and rice all at the same time while making dinner. Some multi-tasking is unavoidable. What I’m saying is just make dinner. Don’t try to make dinner, listen to a podcast, make a grocery list, shop for a new spatula on Amazon and check your favorite blog for tomorrow dinner ideas.
- Take time to eat your meals without doing something else.
- Pause when you are feeling overloaded and take three deep breaths.
- Keep a list and cross things off when you are done.
- Focus on what is right in front of you.
Simplify sister. You don’t need to heap all that extra stress and pressure on yourself.
Let’s chat about distractions next.
2. Enjoy A Social Media Fast For A Whole Week
Don’t worry, I’m not telling you to get rid of social media all together. You can breathe now.
What I am saying is that social media tends to be a time and energy suck, not to mention a comparison factory where you feel like everyone else’s lives are so much more exciting and stress free than yours.
It also distracts you from what is truly important in your life. If you are looking at your phone scrolling, you can’t hear the conversation your kid wants to have with you. You miss your life happening in the present moment. And honey, the present moment is the only one you’ve got. Social media over use distracts you from the gift of seeing your life right in front of you.
Give yourself parameters to use social media in a healthier way. Here are a couple suggestions for setting up a social fast:
- Don’t check your phone right after waking up or right before bed.
- I also suggest not sleeping in the same room as your phone to reduce EMF exposure. If you have to have it for an alarm (go get yourself a cheap alarm clock please!) then put it on airplane mode and place it as far from you as possible.
- Know why you are checking social. Is it to look in on family or friends? Do you use it for work? Are you looking to buy something? That way you can use it for a specific purpose and close it up when you have accomplished your mission.
- Set a timer for 20 minutes and stick to it.
- If you catch yourself mindlessly scrolling, look away from your device, take a deep breath, ask if this is supporting you right now. If not, close the app and move on to something more enjoyable.
3. Schedule Gratitude Breaks
Set a gratitude break on your phone at 11:11, or anytime that resonates for you. Use your alarm feature to make this really easy to remember.
Gratitude is a simple way to shift out of overwhelm, stress and all that isn’t working in your life, to remembering what is good and supportive.
Look for the little things.
Gratitude for my breath, for this moment every day that I take to shift my focus to the positive. Gratitude for the sunshine coming through my window. Gratitude that my kids cleaned up the kitchen after breakfast without me asking. Gratitude that my lover said “thank you” and meant it for making dinner. Gratitude that your colleague acknowledged you for that little extra effort you thought would go unnoticed.
The more you practice gratitude, the more things you find to be grateful for.
Gratitude shifts the focus of your mind, heart, and life towards positive energy and away from the low vibes that can keep you feeling worn out, underappreciated and uninspired.
There you have it dear sister, three simple, not extra things you can do to start changing your life for the better.
You don’t have to live in a never-ending loop of stress.
I’ll be honest with you though, you will keep running on your hamster wheel until you decide not to do it anymore. You are the only one who can make that decision and choose new habits that are more supportive than the rodent one’s you’ve adopted.
You have to stand up for you. Your health, your body, your mind, your energy, your willingness to enjoy life, all of it is up to you beginning to love yourself more.
I guess I’m adding one more step.
4. Practice RADICAL Self Love
I’ll go into this more in depth another day. For now, just know you are worthy of your love. It doesn’t matter what you have done or have failed to do. It doesn’t matter how perfect or imperfect you are. It doesn’t matter if you’ve had 17 failed relationships or if your parents didn’t love you the way you needed.
You. Right now. Are worthy of your love.
Love ALL of you!
Your glaring inadequacies, your fortitude, your stubbornness, your defiance, your generous heart, your willingness to go the extra mile, putting yourself in the back seat for so long, and now choosing to try life a little differently.
You are enough. You are worthy. You are valuable.
With that said, I love you. I appreciate you. I know you are ready to move yourself on your priority list. Because without you, everyone else in your life loses. You are so important and have something amazing to give this world in a way only you can!
Be brave dear goddess! You have the strength within to get off this damned hamster wheel and love your life again!!
With great respect and love,